Monday, December 7, 2009

Bayie Kɔɔɔɔɔ (II) - The Witches Congregate

"The witch cried yesterday and the child died today, who does not know that it was the witch that cried yesterday that killed the child who died today" Yoruba proverb. (

Brutus, My brother from another mother, what will you do if you see a temple in the middle of the forest, and you are told that it is hosting the annual conference of global witches at that moment? Coming from Europe, you may be tempted to draw near the building to see for yourself. But if this happens anywhere in Africa, don't attempt to access anything from that temple using any of your five senses, flee immediately. In my earlier Sakalogue on the activities of the witches of Ghana, I told you these chaps are not friendly, they are deadly. The people of Hyiawu-Besease in the Bosomtwe Kwanwoma District of the Ashanti Region of Ghana are dead worried because the Association of Witches in West Africa (AWWA) has scheduled its annual conference for the town. The chief and people of the town are doing everything under the sun to scuttle these eerie creatures even before the meeting begins.

Dormant prayer warriors have suddenly found the fuel to energize their wheels. A day of prayer and fasting was declared at which the people came together and called on Jehovah to send down warrior angels to scatter the heretic breed. Some intellectuals in the adjoining towns have contacted celebrated mathematicians to calculate the "gyratik radius" – the furthest distance at which you can feel the influence of a gyrating witch. They plan to be outside the "africamotive field" of influence (determined by the gyratic radius) of the conference as a safety measure. Dan Blocker, the chairman of Hyiawu Besease Macho Men (HBMM) has organized his boys to show courage in a way that has annoyed many animal rights activists. The Macho men will take turns in keeping vigil in the forests of the town. Any owl that is seen in the forest must be kicked, crashed, shot or stoned to death. Conspicuously missing in these activities is a libation ceremony to invoke the protection of the ancestors. Our elders are very smart people in Africa. Why invoke the spirit of the ancestors against the witches when every ancestor including my 79 year old grandfather was killed by a witch? They will be no match for the witches.

As I mentioned in my first Sakalogue on witches, the easiest way to identify a witch in a village is to look for a defenseless woman whose face is battered by want, leaving little beauty to be cherished. It is believed that a witches spiritually fly out of their body frames taking the form of  owls as they hounds their prey. They leave their human body in a coma-like state without the ability to respond to stimulus. Based on this knowledge, witch-hunters all over Ghana will pay nocturnal visits to identified suspected witches, whoever fails to respond to loud bangs on the door will be moved from the suspect-list to a list of certified witches and will be dealt with according to the law of the village.

The question on the lips of the people of Hyiawu Besease is "why this town?" In fact, this is the second time in two years that a conference of witches has been scheduled for a town in the Ashanti region. Nobody really knows what happened to the first conference. There is a deity in the Ashanti region called Antoa Nyama, I'm surprised nobody has asked it to make the conference 'nyamaaa'. The problem is we can't tell if the meetings happen or not because nobody knows the form the meetings will take- Physical or spiritual. More interesting is the fact that seemingly, this organization has neither a spokesman nor any identifiable human executive. Their address, both globally and locally, remains unknown, yet their meeting and the agenda has been widely circulated beyond the wildest dreams of any advertising organization for nothing- such a feat can only be chalked by principalities and powers beyond this realm- these must be witches of Africa for sure.

Brutus, you can feel the trepidation in the air. The people of Hyiawu-Besease have already seen some signs. A middle aged woman died shortly after brushing her teeth. A seven bedroom house collapsed and burnt to ashes- I know what you're thinking, shouldn't we withdraw the license of the contractor that put up the building for doing a shoddy job? Hmmm, you see, this one, it is not his fault. It can't be. At a time that witches of unknown origin and indeterminate address have promised the loss of almost a million lives in an operation dubbed "blood galore", every death must be consigned to their account.

I have some personal challenges in my family and some colleagues have advised that it could be attributed to the things I say and write about these awe inspiring creatures but "tofiakwa" with a finger-snap over my head. As Balaam said of Israel to Balak, Numbers 23:23; "There is no enchantment against Ogyakromian, neither is there divination against my family".

Sometimes my bones quiver with great trepidation at these things. No, not of the witches or what they do or do not do, but of the thousands of Ghanaians who do what they shouldn't do, and do not do what they should because of such unsubstantiated stories- opportunities lost!

Yours truly,



  1. Dear Sir,

    After reading a great many stories in the Daily Guide about witches--including the gathering you refer to above--I am unable to ascertain whether your post is serious or sarcastic. Please enlighten me. Thanks very much.

  2. Sgsnow,
    what do you think? By the way , have you read bayiee koooo I? It is the first article (june 2009). Also don't forget the name of this column, it is full of sakalogues.


  3. "Witches Storm Ghana For Conference"
    Sept. 29, 2007
    Daily Guide (Ghana)

    The numerous road accidents, boat disasters, floods in the north, gas explosions in Kumasi and collapse of buildings that the country has witnessed in recent months may not be for nothing.

    A global meeting of witches, currently underway in Ghana, is targeting thousands of lives through fatal road and other accidents.

    The assembly is also looking to infect millions of lives with incurable diseases, according to documents available to DAILY GUIDE.

    In keeping with the witches’ agenda, 1,000,154 people would be killed worldwide through road accidents, rape, murder and armed robbery.

    For Ghana, the organizers of the annual global congress insist they want to make the meeting a memorable one and are therefore requesting heavy loss of lives on the nation’s roads.

    According to the document, Ashanti Region has to ‘donate’ 722 lives, Eastern Region, 119; Brong Ahafo, 103; Central, 134; and Greater Accra, 76; through an operation code-named ‘XXC-XVI-Starlight 666’.

    Delegates from countries in all five continents including USA, India, Iran, South Africa, Spain and Nigeria are attending the historic meeting.

    The two-month long meeting, slated for Juaso Nkwanta in the Ashanti Region, will be chaired by the Regional Commander, one Seth Kofi Manu, and has been described as a follow-up to a maiden one held (venue not stated) on 9th October, 2006 to strategize for the programme in Ghana.

    “In the first quarter of our calendar year we are to infect 110,000 people (both married and unmarried) with HIV/AIDS through sex, 4,000 with tuberculosis, 6,000 with high blood pressure, and 2,600 with blindness, while 11,000 pastors and preachers will be destroyed, 220 marriages broken, and 100,000 wombs destroyed.”

    Apart from the blood of accident victims and the spread of diseases, the association is demanding that 400,000 Ghanaians be initiated into witchcraft and other Satanist organisations before next year’s meeting in Ibadan, Nigeria.

    Out of the 400,000, the agenda stresses that a minimum of 280,000 of the new entrants must be students and pupils of various schools and universities.

    Detailed requirements in this regard are as follows:
    Universities – 35,000 people Other tertiary schools- 45,000 people JSS & SSS-130,000 people Children below 8 years – 80,000 Some of the special guests expected in the country for the meeting include Comrades Gopanatta (India), Kris Mc Anderson (USA), Uki Steward (Nigeria), Daniel Mokoena (South Africa), Mirza Ali Mohammed (Iran), Professor Kingsley Boison (Ghana), and Hooo Mamfred (Spain).

    “Every means must be applied through dressing, planting of hair-making items, exchange of clothes and shoes, sex, abortion, music and their so-called Christian songs. Remember we have agents among them,” the document stressed.

    The next meeting, which is code-named, ‘Sanbra- 333- 000-4, according to the document, would take place on April 1, 2008 in the Nigerian city of Ibadan.

    Featuring prominently on the Nigerian agenda is the plot “to create instability and confusion, and as much as we can, bring civil war in Ghana, Nigeria as we did in Liberia and Sierra Leone, Congo and Sudan”.

    That event would be climaxed with the conferment of an award on Comrade Mirza Ali Mohammed, for the ‘good work’ he is doing in Iraq.

    It was agreed that all efforts must be made to make the meeting in Ghana one of the most memorable ones in the history of the association.

    The Juaso-Nkwanta meeting is part of a three-year grand project (2007-2010) for Satanists all over the world. The project is named, ‘ASTRO-PETAPHYSICAL OPERATION 999’.

    A number of those who saw the document have opined that the inexplicable accidents, murders, shootings, and other disasters that are reported daily could be linked to the demands of the association.

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