Combating the Invading Army of Charlatans

But these speak evil of whatever they do not know; and whatever they know naturally, like brute beasts, in these things they corrupt themselves. ¹¹ Woe to them! For they have gone in the way of Cain, have run greedily in the error of Balaam for profit, and perished in the rebellion of Korah. -Jude 10-11

They may not lay claim to the swiftness of Julius Caesar’s marauding battalions nor the coordination of the allied forces but they are as tenacious in their campaign as any purposeful army. Except that their goals are not ideological, they are materialistic. Through the magic of radio and TV, propelled by microwaves, they invade the sanctity of our living rooms. Not only do we have to protect our children from violent and lewd movies, but also some supposed Christian services. But for the grave consequences their actions have on ordinary Ghanaians, we would have consigned them to the world of comedy and allowed them to jostle for space with the likes of Agya Koo.

They masquerade as anything that is noble in scripture, Prophets, Bishops, Reverends, and more. They murder the scriptures without mercy, shock our sensibilities, and pollute the atmosphere with profane insults that I don’t hear anymore in the streets of Accra, yet they still command large followings. Out of the abundance of their hearts flow curses that even though of no effect, will not be acceptable in any heathen shrine. Yet they lay claims to the only Lord that is Sovereign. If this is not the abomination that causes desolation (Mat 24:15, Dan 11:31) then what is?

That our society tolerates these charlatans is ample evidence of the fine balance we have to tread between personal liberties and public order. But I believe these guys have done enough to at least attract a caution from a court of competent jurisdiction. Since Joy FM aired some of the ludicrous outbursts of these characters, there have been calls to restrict religious liberties because of these bandits, but it is my opinion that we should jealously guard the freedom given to us by our constitution to worship freely. We cannot throw out the baby with the bath water. We can weed out the chaff through other freedoms guaranteed by the constitution.

It is important we recognize the fact that religion by its very nature is amenable to such grave abuses. Because God has no physical address accessible to mortals to go and clarify arguments about divinity and divine instructions, he has become subject to human interpretations of a myriad of scriptures and revelations purported to have been seen over the centuries. Out of this deep valley of confusion, has sprung various religious sects and denominations. Unfortunately, some scoundrels have identified Man’s inclination to seek his Maker as fertile ground to ply their scams and have decided to take advantage of our deep religious bearings. The mass following Christianity enjoys in Ghana makes it most vulnerable to such abuses. It is therefore no surprise that most of these unbelieving villains who have no respect for God or his son Jesus Christ confer holy titles onto themselves and parade the corridors of spiritual notoriety incognito. Through unsubstantiated miracles, they amass a following of gullible Ghanaians who throng their services by day and night. They get away with their nefarious acts because many Ghanaians refuse to question anything that purports spirituality. How many people can attest that the deaf man who was healed was deaf before the church service? I have always argued that the rate at which we hear reports of miracles, it should be easy to find Ghanaians who actually know a cripple, who lived among them, that was healed in a crusade or service. It should be easy to find a community in Ghana who lived with a man born blind, who went to a crusade one day and the next day he could see. Try looking for any of these and you will be better off finding a hawk that has a chicken for a girlfriend. Simply put, most of these miracles are faked! Hardly a day passes without hearing strange things from these scam artists; “A man of God sells canes to whip the devil”, “A pastor washes genitals of a woman at the beach” , “One prophet sleeps on a woman on TV to heal her”, “A preacher inserts his fingers in a woman’s private part whiles her husband stands next to her, in the name of healing a barren womb”, Aba! Can’t they even fake the decency that the office they usurp deserves?

I think identifying a fake man of God should not be difficult. I propose three simple rules.

i. Character before charisma
ii. Common Sense (Yes Common sense)
iii. Congruence

Charisma refers to spiritual gifts and powers, more importantly, it can be faked. People fake healing, tongues, prophecies etc. Character however, is more difficult to fake over the long term. The bible is clear about what constitutes the fruits of the spirit in Galatians 5:22 - love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. It Goes further in verse 26 to state what they are not - Let us not become boastful, challenging one another, envying one another. How can we then ignore the characters openly exhibited by these men as they curse, boast, fight and openly challenge each other? They even go about threatening to change people into vultures. My proposition- Character first, charisma next. Identify them by their fruits not by their gifts.

Many people believe common sense cannot be applied to spiritual things, but I beg to differ. Many preachers encourage that train of thought because they know that with your thinking caps on you can easily decipher between a miracle and a ruse. When Moses saw the bush on fire yet not consumed, it was common sense that made him take notice. When Jesus Christ healed blind people and lepers, there were always people who attested to the fact that the people had been blind from childhood. There were times Christ asked them to show themselves to the priests. If a “preacher” asks your wife to strip naked and asks you to look away, please listen, your common sense is right, this is supposed to be spiritual healing not a medical examination. Clothes are no barriers to the spirit. If a preacher appears on TV to say he has raised the dead, please remember, the stage was set by him, take it with a pinch of salt until you have reason not to. If we do not exact the highest level of proof from miracle workers, we will remain pawns in their carefully hatched schemes. God gave you the brains and the senses for a single purpose- to use them, please do so without feeling guilty.

My last anti-Charlatan dose is Congruence with scripture. If the man appears and says he is working miracles based on the Christian bible; then use the bible as a meter rule to measure his deeds. The bible describes the people of Berea as having greater nobility because among other things, they used the scriptures to authenticate the message they received (Acts 17:11). The bible explicitly warns Israel against Necromancy (inquiring of the dead), yet one of these “Men of God” appeared on TV and claimed he was speaking to a woman’s dead husband. The fact that he still has a congregation says a lot about the scriptural foundations of the people who sit at his feet.

Religious pretenders have led many to their deaths in tragic circumstances; some of them have destroyed families and many lives. The fact remains that you are the only one who can save yourself from these charlatans. The law is inadequate.

Combat the Charlatans with Character, Common Sense and Congruence.

How Much is Your Blessing?

Dear Brutus,

Did you watch Adebayor against Arsenal in the English Premier league? He picked his spot, delivered a stunning header that beat Almunia who was manning the posts for Arsenal, It was a goal!. He took off like a cheetah that has spotted a prey in the forests of the Kalahari. I don’t know if anybody timed the run but I suspect it will be the envy of many world class sprinters. He had one aim, to present himself to the arsenal fans who have thrown unprintable insults at him before and during the game. They wished for his downfall but “tofiakwa”, his God is a God of judgment. He has promised in his word “My head will be lifted up above my enemies around me”. He ended the run with a skid in front of the agitated fans from London, he didn’t utter a word but his posture said it all- enemy shame! See what has become of me. Many from his homeland in West Africa praised God for their beloved, but that is when they were thrown into stupor. It must be a culture shock. All the press in England went crazy. Senseless, Silly, and nonsensical were some of the adjectives used to describe his 90 yard dash celebration. What has he done wrong? He just celebrated a goal.

Brutus, some background will be helpful. In this part of Africa, governments provide us with nothing, so we learn to depend on God so much. Things you take for granted in Europe are miracles in our world. To hold a simple election in Ogyakrom for instance, we have to start fasting one year before the election so that only a few people will be killed in isolated incidence of madness. Malaria is a well known disease with a well defined cure yet thousands die of malaria. Through the hard way we have learnt to depend on God. That is why we don’t play with our religion. Majority of Ogyakromians believe an ensemble of witches have been assigned to orchestrate nothing but destruction against them. These witches are usually unassuming people during the day but suddenly metamorphose into powerful owls that sore to heights that confound the eagle. It is therefore very important that all Ogyakromians keep a diary of people who “look at them in some way”. They will be the subject of their prayer topic during the next retreat.

So when it comes to dealing with enemies, we don’t spare a prayer against them. It is common to see phrases “like let my enemy live long and see what I will be in future” boldly inscribed on vehicles. We love to “pepper” our enemies with our success no matter how small. When a woman gets a new cloth from her daughter, it is not only flaunted in the face of other contenders in the village, but the message is made complete through lyrical finesse laden with innuendos. Simply put, our success is incomplete if our enemies don’t see what has become of us.

In this light, when we saw Adebayor’s celebration, we knew his blessing was complete. In fact Pastors wrote new blessings for their congregations.
“Your feet shall be anointed as Adebayor’s and you will run before the enemy and you will not faint”.
“May the blessings of Adebayor over take you.”

But alas, before they could deliver these great blessings to their congregations everybody went hey wire in England. And the biggest shock, Adebayor has been fined £25 000 for his celebration! Is that the cost of a blessing? Even the bible agrees that we celebrate before our enemies. Do you remember the very popular Psalm 23:5? “Thou prepared a table before me, in the presence of my enemies”. So why are the guys who showed us the direction to the bible putting such a high cost to a blessing?

The English FA has caused a lot of commotion in Ogyakrom. My bosom friend called ‘Thy Will Be Done’ came home downcast the other day. He was just returning from a Pastor who has been praying with him to find a beautiful wife. The pastor has got a new revelation. Every Blessing has a cost, and the Pastor has published the price list for various blessings.
A blessing to overcome your enemies: ¢25 000
A blessing to buy a new car ¢1000
A blessing to Pass Exams ¢2500
A blessing for a wife: ¢10 000

At that point he stopped reading. His whole world collapsed instantly, he will never be able to afford a wife. Brutus what consolation could I offer him? I could only say, “Oh God! Thy Will be Done, it is well”. And I hope it doesn’t come with a cost.

Sincerely yours

Ogyakromian!!!

Building Bridges, Our Core Business- Mabey & Johnson

This is a statement from the management of Mabey & Johnson to explain events leading to criminal conviction of the company in Southwark Crown Court in London on 25^th September 2009. We wish to submit that we were put under pressure to plead guilty to charges of paying bribes in Ghana by an English court that used Anglo-Saxon definition of bribery with little understanding of the culture and norm of the West African country.

We wish to state without equivocation that our core business is to build bridges and that is the exact mission we pursued in Ghana. We arrived in Ghana at the early stages of the country’s adventure into republic hood for the fourth time. At the time, the country was led by fiery former revolutionary who was having a hard time adjusting to the pace and beat of democratic governance. The then president, who felt let down by the British crown for teaming up with other western powers to lure him into a political process totally out of pace with his training and genetic makeup, loathed everything British. It was believed that this country which had been selected by the Western powers and Breton Woods institutions as a model state was in danger of falling back into the hands of the friends of the defeated communist regime. The likes of Gathaffi and Castro were trying hard to convince him that he made a mistake by rejecting their philosophy of the State. Against this backdrop and the fact that many British company’s were in dire need of new markets to sustain economic growth, the lot fell on Mabey and Johnson, to get into Ghana, you guessed right, to build bridges between the two economies.

This is a concept well understood and practiced by communities in Africa for centuries. To build bridges to the King, you enter his gates not only with thanks giving and praises but with a gift of hard liqueur under your armpit. As you pass on the bottle to the King through his advisers, and once the content of the bottle goes round the palace, your connection is established – a firm bridge is built to carry your message to officialdom. This is exactly what we did in Ghana.

We wish to put it on record that the actions of Mabey and Johnson were in the interest of North – South cooperation, a relationship which is well understood and eloquently espoused by Tony Blair the British PM at the time who actually christened it NEPAD. The fact that Ghana stands to benefit over two billion pounds sterling attests to the strength of that relationship.

We are in no way endorsing the actions of the people who took the money, in fact we don’t know what they did to the money, but we believe that we did no wrong we merely executed our mission in Africa- Building Bridges.

PS:

Maybe Mabey and Johnson gives us the opportunity to examine our public procurement system. I do not believe that the canker of bribery that underlines most procurement decisions was touched by the so called procurement law. Speak to any business man who participates in a government contract and he will tell you “the ways and means” that fraught the process of selecting suppliers. The situation is such that companies that win tenders fairly (I dare say it will be easier to clean the filth in the Korle lagoon than find one) are under pressure to say “thank you” even when they haven’t been asked to. We need radical solutions to uproot corruption. What about banning the giving and taking of gifts in any form? It’s a thought.